托福写作范文的批改3

2020-01-16 16:24:00来源:网络

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  Topic

  Do you agree or disagree the following statement? Successful people take new things and take risks rather than the thing that they've done well

  Rewritten Sample Writing

  The world today is filled with competition in all areas. Some people who want to be successful, do what they are good at, while others may think they can try something new or take risks to achieve success. Personally, I think those who have the latter opinion have more chances to be successful.

  Needless to say, people will face no or few competitors when they do things in new fields, which means that they can occupy the whole market once consumers can accept their products. Bill Gate's success is a good example. He became one of the most successful persons in the world, by developing the products for global customers.

  On the other hand, people cannot easily become successful if they continue doing the things that have been done well by themselves and others. One important reason is that there must be a number of competitors in these areas, and the other is that the benefits of older products are lower compared with new and innovative ones.

  Meanwhile, as the first person entering in one certain area, he can decide many things about the product, such as the price, types, functions and policies.

  As a result, subsequent competitors have to follow these things that he has decided earlier. Microsoft is again a helpful example here. After Microsoft's products came into the market, its competitors had to research their products and produce similar ones. To be the first in one area means more opportunities to be successful, although at the same time, it means more risks.

  From these types of success, we can conclude that to produce new products and take risks are good ways for people to be successful. New things mean more opportunities and fewer competitors, so it is indeed a good choice to try something new if people want to gain achievement in their lives.

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新东方托福公益课-名师教你解题新技能(1元领课)

听力:生命科学难题“生态学讲座结构和考点
写作:如何利用单一观点写法,有效行文
  口语:如何appeal to the speech rater
 阅读:托福阅读目的题--如何看清例证关系

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