托福写作的提分关键

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　　一、句式变化

　　1. 变换句子的开头结构

　　l 名词做主语

　　l 介词短语作状语

　　l 副词作状语

　　l 状语从句

　　l 分词短语作状语

　　l 形容词短语作状语

　　l 主语从句

　　l 不定式短语做主语或状语

　　l 动名词做主语

　　To begin with, even in such areas as computer science, where it is estimated that much of what a student learns today will be obsolete in just five years, an advanced degree and the education it represents will continue to be of benefit. Unlike undergraduate education, which is divided into a number of small educational units every term, post-baccalaureate education is concentrated on deeper learning in fewer areas. Moreover, most graduate education requires extended, critical focus on complex issues or research projects. And even if the technical information relevant to completing a graduate-level project becomes outmoded, the learned critical methods and problem-solving approaches will not.

　　2. 使用不同的句型结构

　　Today’s education system places too much emphasis on students’ desires rather than their needs. Accordingly, students are searching for the easy way out, and educators are willingly conspiring with them. As opposed to this trend, I would argue that students should study what is presented to them rather than what is desired by them. Not only should educators determine the curriculum, but also they should strive to insure that each individual student truly gains from his/her education, rather than just breezes through it.

　　二、承上启下

　　1. 表示结论

　　in conclusion

　　in sum

　　to conclude

　　to sum up

　　2. 表示肯定程度

　　certainly

　　clearly

　　obviously

　　plainly

　　apparently

　　surely

　　undoubtedly

　　naturally

　　for certain

　　for sure

　　of course

　　never

　　always

　　possibly

　　perhaps

　　likely

　　probably

　　potentially

　　presumably

　　to some extend

　　in a large sense

　　generally speaking

　　in a sense

　　generally

　　in some sense

　　normally

　　ideally

　　3. 引出新观点

　　first

　　second

　　third

　　finally

　　in the first place

　　in the second place

　　last but not least

　　first of all

　　next

　　another

　　In addition

　　additionally

　　further

　　furthermore

　　moreover

　　also

　　likewise

　　similarly

　　more importantly

　　imagine

　　suppose

　　most importantly

　　for one thing

　　for another

　　4. 引出详细解释

　　specifically

　　particularly

　　for example

　　for instance

　　in this case

　　in that case

　　as well as

　　in that

　　such as

　　in addition to

　　5. 表示对照或其他观点

　　otherwise

　　however

　　nevertheless

　　though

　　although

　　yet

　　meanwhile

　　while

　　But

　　instead

　　still

　　anyway

　　unlike

　　on the contrary

　　by contrast

　　by comparison

　　in any case

　　at any rate

　　in spite of

　　rather than

　　on the one hand

　　on the other hand

　　even if

　　apart from

　　instead of

　　even so

　　6. 表示证据出现

　　since

　　because

　　actually

　　in fact

　　as a matter of fact

　　as a result

　　due to

　　owing to

　　7. 表示推理

　　as a result

　　accordingly

　　consequently

　　hence

　　thus

　　ultimately

　　thereby

　　therefore

　　as a consequence

　　if so

　　if not

　　according to

　　8. 表示反复说明

　　in other words

　　briefly

　　that is

　　三、巧用修辞

　　1. 排比对称结构

　　Despite all the evidence, experts continue to debate weather global warming exists, how extensive the problem is, what the likely effects will be and whether any remedy is possible.

　　Despite all the evidence, experts continue to debate the existence of global warming, the extent of the problem, its likely effects and any possible remedy.

　　2. 比喻

　　(1)明喻：比喻词出现：as, like, as if…

　　In many ways, no doubt, our world grows more and more complex, sputniks cannot be simple; yet how many of our complexities remain futile, how many of our artificialities false. Simplicity too can be subtle-as the straight lines of a Greek temple, like the Parthenon at Athens, are delicately curved in order to look straighter still.

　　(2)暗喻：比喻词不出现。

　　America has given the Negro people a bad check, which has come back marked insufficient funds.

　　3. 对照：加深印象

　　Extremism in defense of liberty is no vice; moderation is the pursuit of justice is no virtue.

　　4. 类比

　　The Negro has a callus growing on his soul and it is getting harder and harder to hurt him here. That is a simple law of nature. Like a callus on the foot in a shoe that is too tight. The foot is nature’s and that shoe was put on by man. The tight shoe will pinch your foot and make you holler and scream. But sooner or later, if you do not take the shoe off, a callus will form on the foot and begin to wear out the shoe.

　　It is the same with the Negro in America. That shoe-the white man’s system—has pinched and rubbed and squeezed his soul until it has almost destroyed him. But it did not. And how a callus has formed on his soul, and unless that system is adjusted to fit him, too, that callus is going to wear our that system.

　　5. 拟人

　　Dawn was beginning to prowl about the sky and put out the starts.

　　6. 夸张

　　For she was beautiful—her beauty made the bright world dim, and everything beside seemed like the fleeting image of a shade.

　　四、文体恰当

　　1. 少用Be动词等静态词

　　A common characteristic of developing countries is an inadequate supply of food. Inadequate food supply is the leading cause of malnutrition. Malnutrition is the condition in which the immune system is weakened and resistance to disease is lowered. There are over 500 million children in developing countries who are malnourished. As a result, one is seven is dead before the age of five. Due to this high rate of infant mortality, in some societies naming of children is a ceremony that is not performed until the child has survived for some specified period of time.

　　Developing countries characteristically lack adequate food supplies. This inadequacy causes malnutrition, which wakens the immune system and lowers resistance to disease. Over 500 million children in developing countries suffer from malnutrition. As a result, one in seven dies before the age of five. Due to this high rate of infant mortality, some societies postpone naming children until the child has survived for some specified period.

　　2. 少用被动语态

　　Last year it was recommended by the student government that a board of review be created so that students would be given a greater voice in campus governance. The proposal was accepted by the faculty, the president, and the board of trustees. A nine-member board of review was authorized, to be elected by students and faculty. College policies are reviewed by the board and, if they are determined to be inconsistent with the basic purpose of the college, must be revised unless the board’s decision is vetoed by the president.

　　Last year the student government recommended that the school create a board of review to give students a greater voice in student governance. The faculty, the president, and the board of trustees accepted the proposal and authorized a nine-member board of review, elected by faculty and students. The board reviews college policies to determine whether any are inconsistent with the basic purpose of the college. The college must revise any policy the board recommends, unless the president vetoes the board’s decision.

　　3. 使用正规文体

　　(1) don’t, mustn’t, he’s, I’ve

　　do not, must not, he is, I have

　　(2) You never know what new measures the President will have.

　　One never knows what new measures the President will take.

　　(3) Who is the secretary talking with?

　　With whom is the secretary talking?

　　(4) I think it’s a good idea.

　　I think that it is a good idea.

　　(5) Anyone can take a brochure if they want it.

　　Anyone can take a brochure if he or she wants it.

　　(everybody, someone, somebody, anyone, anybody, no one, nobody)

　　(6) The old lady treated him as if he was her own son.

　　The old lady treated him as if he were her own son.

　　(7) The team was badly defeated in the match, and they returned in low spirits.

　　Badly defeated in the match, the team returned in low spirits.

　　(8) Africa is the second largest continent. It is about three times as large as China.

　　Africa is the second largest continent, its size being about three times that of China.

　　(9) He was eager to finish the work, so he continued to do it until midnight.

　　Eager to finish the work, he continued to do it until midnight.

　　(10) She has experienced love, grief, hate and happiness.

　　She has experienced love and hate, grief and happiness.

　　(11) begin—commence; deep—profound; lucky—fortunate; end—terminate;

　　begin or continue—proceed; raise-elevate; unnecessary—gratuitous;

　　clear—explicit; same-identical; learned-erudite; try-endeavor;

　　queer or strange--eccentric

　　(12) go on—continue; look into—investigate; come across—meet; turn out—produce

　　put up with—bear or endure; get away—leave

　　(13) photo—photograph; ad—advertisement; bike—bicycle; pop—popular

　　Gym—gymnasium/gymnastics

　　(14) lousy—bad, terrible; mighty—very, extremely; neat, cool—fine, pleasant;

　　in hot water—in trouble; make a hit—succeed in doing something;

　　make a big deal about something—exaggerate the seriousness of something

　　talk someone’s head off—speak too much

　　4. 散句与圆周句

　　l If we wish to remain free, if we mean to maintain justice, if we hope to be esteemed throughout the world, we must be prepared to defend, whenever it is threatened, the liberty of each individual citizen.

　　l With the trumpets of blaring, the drums booming, and the children screaming their wild delight, the marchers passed in review.

　　l We have done our best, although our dreams have now faded, our efforts have proved fruitless, and we have tasted the bitterness of defeat.

　　l Even though the day was bright and sunny, and children played near the gate, unaware of what had happened there twenty-five years ago, most of the adult visitors at the site could still feel the unutterable terror of the place.

　　l Everyone was laughing, despite the fact that our car had a flat tire, and it had started to rain, and some large black ants were devouring our picnic lunch.

　　五、语法规范

　　1. 不完整的句子

　　(1) If you find that writing is hard is because it is hard. One of the hardest things that people do.

　　If you find that writing is hard is because it is hard—one of the hardest things that people do.

　　(2) Stereotypes are a kind of gossip about the world. A gossip that makes us prejudge people before we ever lay eyes on them.

　　Stereotypes are a kind of gossip about the world, a gossip that makes us prejudge people before we ever lay eyes on them.

　　Stereotypes are a kind of gossip about the world that makes us prejudge people before we ever lay eyes on them.

　　2. 分词短语作状语的错误

　　Holding her in his arms, the moon hid behind the cloud.

　　As soon as the moon hid behind the cloud, he held her in his arms.

　　3. 修饰词错位

　　(1) Romeo received word that Juliet was dead from another messenger.

　　Romeo received word from another messenger that Juliet was dead.

　　(2) After leaving the stage, the audience’s applause called the musicians back for an encore.

　　After the musicians left the stage, the audience’s applause called them back for an encore.

　　(3) Disruptive in the classroom, a teacher may become exasperated with hyperactive children.

　　Disruptive in the classroom, hyperactive children may exasperate a teacher.

　　4. 串句

　　Unproductive or uncooperative workers can seriously harm an organization, for this reason, employers need to have accurate information about employee performance, but when employees have full access to their own personnel files, co-workers and even supervisors will often find it difficult to give frank criticism of underachievers or to report troublemakers.

　　Unproductive or uncooperative workers can seriously harm an organization; for this reason, employers need to have accurate information about employee performance. But when employees have full access to their own personnel files, co-workers and even supervisors will often find it difficult to give frank criticism of underachievers or to report troublemakers.

　　5. 时态错误

　　The researchers admitted that they falsified crucial data in the study.

　　The researchers admitted that they had falsified crucial data in the study.

　　6. 代词错误

　　(1) Too often people either keep their feelings to themselves or take it our on others.

　　Too often people either keep their feelings to themselves or take them our on others.

　　(2) Each girl and boy must do their part to keep the home fires burning.

　　Each girl and boy must do her or his part to keep the home fires burning.

　　(3) This college has their own entrance requirements.

　　This college has its own entrance requirements.

　　(4) If one wishes to participate in the political process, you can begin by voting regularly.

　　If one wishes to participate in the political process, one can begin by voting regularly.

　　(5) The fire in the library was finally put out. For a while, they thought an unhappy employee might have started it.

　　The fire in the library was finally put out. For a while, the library staff thought an unhappy employee might have started it.

　　7. 结构混乱

　　Because Hemingway’s style is simple makes his writing accessible to all readers.

　　Because Hemingway’s style is simple, his writing is accessible to all readers.

　　Hemingway’s simple style makes his writing accessible to all readers.

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